IANSWEETisn’tinterestedinbeingthe“sadgirl”anymore

From touring with American Football to releasing her fifth album, Shiverstruck, IAN SWEET’s Jilian Medford discusses rediscovering the joy of making music, embracing vulnerability and learning to love every imperfect part of herself.

 

WORDS Flore Boitel

 

Interview taken from IMAGINE Magazine Issue Three Pre Order here

 

After more than a decade of creating music as IAN SWEET, Jilian Medford finds herself in a place of reflection, growth and renewed creative freedom with her latest record, Shiverstruck. The album, set to release on July 24, marks a moment of deep self-examination, one where vulnerability, confidence, humour, and uncertainty all exist side by side.

 

Written during a period of major personal change, including her time living in New York, Shiverstruck explores what it means to sit with yourself, embrace your imperfections, and move through life’s messier moments with honesty and compassion. Rather than looking back with regret, the record feels like an act of acceptance: a celebration of the chaotic, emotional, and deeply human experiences that shape who we become.

 

Throughout the album, Medford allows herself to step beyond the expectations that have followed her throughout her career. Known as the “sad girl”, she explores a wider emotional landscape on Shiverstruck, one that makes room for joy, humour, tenderness, and growth. The result is a record that feels deeply personal while still leaving space for listeners to find their own stories within it.

 

For Medford, the process of making the album was about returning to the heart of why she started creating music in the first place: the need to express something honest, the feeling of turning emotions into songs, and the joy of making something that feels entirely her own. Shiverstruck embraces the imperfections and human moments that make music feel alive.

 

Speaking with IMAGINE, Medford reflects on finding confidence through vulnerability, creating space between herself and the IAN SWEET project, the experiences that shaped Shiverstruck, the importance of embracing every part of yourself, and why the most meaningful moments in her career have often been found in the quiet ones.

Flore Boitel: You’re about to kick off your tour with American Football tonight in Boston. How are you feeling? What are you most looking forward to?

 

Jilian Medford: Touring is one of my favourite parts of making music. It’s incredible to bring the songs to life because they always find new meaning through performing them over and over. Every time I play a song, I relate to it a little differently depending on where I am emotionally.

 

Touring also forces you to be really present. You’re living in the van, travelling from venue to venue, and everything is focused on the show. If your headspace is kind of floaty, it can be distracting, so I love that it keeps me grounded in the moment.

 

FB: You grew up in Los Angeles and have also lived in New York. How have those places shaped you as an artist?

 

JM: Growing up in LA was such a great experience. My mom works in the art world, so I was always surrounded by creative people. My parents encouraged self-expression from a young age, and that was really formative.

 

I also love California’s nature, it’s such a beautiful place and it’s much more calm and I can focus more. New York, on the other hand, is so special for being a little bit more chaotic and messy. I’ve just felt so inspired by both places.

 

“I also love California’s nature, it’s such a beautiful place and it’s much more calm and I can focus more. New York, on the other hand, is so special for being a little bit more chaotic and messy. I’ve just felt so inspired by both places.”

 

FB: Where did the title Shiverstruck come from?

 

JM: I made up that word. It comes from the idea of a shiver or a shock, it’s more of a feeling than anything. It’s about being really taken by your emotions, being swept away by something, but not having the whole world crumble around you because you’re feeling sad or down. Shiverstruck is about letting something pass through you.

 

FB: Shiverstruck feels like a record about finding your way back to yourself. When did you realise that was the story you were telling?

 

JM: Honestly, not until the record was finished. I think there’s a confidence in these songs that I didn’t even pick up on while I was writing them. Through the stories I was telling, I felt more confident because I was getting closer to feeling like I was telling the story I wanted to tell, not leaving anything out, and being extremely vulnerable and myself through these songs. Hopefully, the listener can hear that. It feels like the most me and the most genuine thing I’ve had a chance to make.

 

 

FB: Is there one song that feels especially personal?

 

JM: They really all do in their own way. They all represent different parts of myself. But I think probably the song ‘Jilian’ is a true look in the mirror, a reflection on who I am and who I’ve become.

 

It’s also about finding humour and a bit of sarcasm in my personality. That song is really important to me because I’m speaking to myself and having this sit-down conversation like, “girl.”

 

FB: Writing so directly about yourself could be intimidating. Did it feel vulnerable or liberating?

 

JM: That’s a really good question. I think it felt extremely liberating to reflect in that way and be open and honest with myself about the patterns I’ve been repeating for years, the person I am, my flaws, my chaotic parts, and my imperfections. But I also love those things about myself. I think that’s part of getting older and growing into your personality, finding your voice, your purpose, and really understanding yourself. That song helped me in that way. It was a practice in finding a little more self-compassion when speaking about myself and writing about myself.

FB: You’ve spoken about creating more distance between Jilian and IAN SWEET. Why was that important?

 

JM: I’ve been doing this for over 10 years now, and IAN SWEET, the project, is my everything. Every breath and every thought is in this project. As beautiful as it is to have something to put so much energy into, I also think that sometimes I don’t check in with who I am or what I need. I joke about it, it’s like I have a split personality disorder. I’m like, “IAN SWEET and Jilian, I promise we’re the same.” But I think it was important to find the Jilian voice and not hide behind the IAN SWEET veil, and really let both exist. I wanted to create a boundary where both can thrive and where I can feel good in any situation, even if it’s just Jilian playing solo. That still feels good.

 

FB: Is songwriting therapy, storytelling, or something else entirely?

 

JM: I think songwriting is a way for me to process emotions that I’m not fully ready to put into the real world. I’ve been thinking lately about how some songs are like casting little spells or manifesting things in my life that haven’t even happened yet. Sometimes I use songwriting as a tool to look towards the future, assess where I want to go, or understand where I want to be.

 

This record feels more like looking ahead. It has moments about past relationships and experiences, but for the most part, it’s about recognising those things and moving towards something new, trying to get through it with grace and understanding of myself. It’s definitely a form of therapy. There’s no better feeling than writing a song you’re really excited about and then feeling this enormous release afterwards. You feel lighter.

 

FB: Was there a lyric on the album you’re especially proud of?

 

JM: I spent so much time on the lyrics on this record. They were actually the main focal point for me. I was dissecting everything and rearranging things constantly. My notebooks looked like absolute chaos. Getting to that point was really important because I didn’t want to look back on any of these songs and wish I had changed something or said something differently.

 

A lyric that pops into my head right now is from the opening song, ‘987’. It’s a much more stripped-back song, but there’s a lyric: “You’re the girl in the wreckage. You’ve got ten seconds now, 987.” That’s one of my favourite lyrics. It feels like a very zoomed-out portrait of looking at what you’ve created and taking a closer look at the world around you, or what you’ve built around you. Maybe things have exploded, but you’re still standing. You’re still getting up every day, doing something, and putting one foot in front of the other, no matter how hard it is.

 

 

FB: You’ve talked about moving beyond the “sad girl” label. Do audiences sometimes expect artists to stay emotionally frozen in the version they first connected with?

 

JM: Definitely. I think that’s a tough thing with audiences. You want your fans to stay with you and grow with you, but you also want to be able to grow as an artist.

 

If you’re not growing, what’s the point? If you’re not evolving as a human being and going through the full spectrum of emotions, the music probably isn’t going to be as good because there’s only one note to sing if you don’t have a variety of experiences. I’m actually a very happy, joyful person. My personality is very giddy. I love being with my friends, and I love laughing more than anything. But I also love a good cry. There’s nothing better than completely releasing everything and crying your brains out.

 

I think you hope your audience wants to grow with you and see different sides of you. For me, it’s important not to feel boxed in by the narrative of being a “sad girl” or making sad indie music, because there’s such a big spectrum of emotions.

 

FB: You wrote this album while living in New York, and you’ve said your time there made every mistake and misstep feel larger than life. How did that period shape the way you see yourself today, and how did those experiences translate into the songs?

 

JM: My time in New York was really about spending a lot of time alone. You spend so much time alone in New York, but you’re never really alone. I love my alone time, but I think I had to really sit with myself and my feelings, and become comfortable with that isolation. Sometimes I chose it. I got into a routine where friends would be like, “Come out, come out,” and I’d think, “I might actually feel better being by myself.” I started diving into that practice of sitting with my thoughts and becoming comfortable with it.

 

Every misstep and every mistake feels larger than life in New York. If you miss an exit, take the train the wrong way, get off, someone’s screaming at you, it becomes this whole series of events until you completely lose your mind. Then you start again the next day and see what happens. Every day is a completely new experience there, and that’s what I love. You can start fresh and be whoever you want to be.

 

FB: You also dealt with AI-generated music being released under your name. Did that experience change how you think about protecting your work?

 

JM: A little bit. Even before the AI thing happened, I really wanted to make this record feel super human.

 

I wanted you to be able to hear me walking, turning on instruments, and feel like you were in the room with us because the songs are so personal. I wanted the production to embrace how raw and real the process was.

 

It’s funny that an AI-generated song came out because it couldn’t be more opposite from what I’m embracing and what I’m about. The song was honestly hilarious. It was so strange, I don’t even know how to describe it. It sounded like a Russian clown jig or something.

 

The music is important because I want people to hear the imperfections, the smudges, the skips. I really love that. It feels like proof that I was there, that I was there making this.

FB: You’re touring with American Football before heading out on your own headline tour. Does opening for another band require a different mindset?

 

JM: It really does. I think I’m probably much more anxious when it’s a headline tour because I’m thinking, “Are they going to like it? Are they going to come?” But it’s also so special when it’s your headline show and people are specifically there to support you and hear your songs.

 

I love opening as well because it’s so fun to play for people who might not know your music. Then you make new fans and new friends in new places. Opening is just a little less pressure because not every person is there specifically for you.

 

FB: What’s been your proudest career moment so far?

 

JM: Honestly, probably the really simple, quiet moments. I remember being in Atlanta recording the record and coming home after a night of making music. Those moments where I was just sitting there, connected with the music, were really special. I think this album is probably my proudest moment because it feels like what I set out to make.

FB: How do you define success today?

 

JM: I’m still figuring that out. I’m not sure. I think it’s in the moments of playing my songs and feeling proud of them. It’s waking up every day and feeling grateful. I think just waking up every day is a success.

 

FB: What do you hope listeners take away from Shiverstruck?

 

JM: This album was made during a period where I was really figuring things out about myself, learning new things, and finding comfort through that. I hope listeners can find that same kind of comfort, a safe place to put their emotions or have their feelings on display. I hope people take away that embracing the messiness, and even the parts of yourself that you don’t think are lovable, is important. Those parts are incredibly lovable too.

 

FB: You also spent time working with children while making the album. Did that influence your creativity?

 

JM: Definitely. Working with kids is really special because they’re so unfiltered. They can be incredibly happy one second, and then something small happens and their whole world crashes in front of your eyes. Being with kids helped me become more impulsive in a good way and more present in every moment. It also helped me on days when I was in a bad mood or having a difficult day. I would show up and sing to these kids, and seeing their faces light up reminded me what music actually does.

 

Even when they don’t completely understand what’s happening, music is so immediate. It can change someone’s mood, or it can allow you to sit in your emotions and feel them as deeply as you need to. Music helps you embrace those feelings and strengthen them, because you can find your own story within a song and make it fit into your life in the way that feels right. I think being around kids helped me become more immediate and present.

 

 

FB: Why did you choose the Bob Baker Marionette Theater to celebrate the album?

 

JM: I’ve always wanted to play at Bob Baker. It’s such a staple in LA and such a special place. The first time I saw a show there, my jaw was literally on the floor the entire time. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. It’s such a magical place, even as an adult. I felt really inspired to have the songs exist alongside that energy.

 

It’s going to be this amazing juxtaposition of the puppets dancing while we’re singing a sad song, but I love that. I feel like that’s really who I am too. Like I said earlier, I’m a really joyful person, and Bob Baker has that same energy. It’s such a happy place. I wanted to have all those different parts of myself on display that night and celebrate the record.

 

FB: What are some of your biggest musical influences today, and how have they changed since your earlier records?

 

JM: I think my influences have evolved and changed, but I’ve always been drawn to music that feels so much like the person behind it, music that feels honest and truthful to the artist. That’s why I love Patti Smith. She’s so unapologetically herself. I also love The O.R.k for that reason because there’s nobody like them. They’re such singular people.

 

I think when I was younger, I was more drawn to heavier rock music. Over time, I’ve embraced softer, more honest, vulnerable writers. Neko Case was a big influence for this record as well. I’ve been really inspired by these strong female voices.

 

FB: Looking back at the version of yourself who started IAN SWEET over ten years ago, what do you think she’d be most surprised by?

 

JM: I don’t really think she’d be surprised. I feel like I’m kind of right where I’m supposed to be, it’s an incredible experience to get to do this. It doesn’t come without a lot of struggle, especially being a musician and an indie musician, but I’ve always been so driven and known that this is where my heart is. I think the IAN SWEET from 10 years ago had that same fire and that same drive. I haven’t ever lost that.

 

FB: Finally, are you focused on what’s happening now, or are you already thinking about what’s next?

 

JM: I’m definitely trying to be present, but I’m always thinking about what’s next. I don’t have a set plan. I just know I’m feeling really inspired to keep making things.

 

Even though this record is just about to come out, I already want to write more. That never really happens for me. Usually I’ll finish a record and not want to play guitar for a year because it feels like it took everything out of me. But this one feels different. I just want to keep playing, and that’s really exciting to me.

 

After the headline tour, we’ll keep planning more shows. More shows will be coming, and I want to keep creating things and seeing what happens, and hang out with my dog Blueberry.